the_deserted's Datingish

crossing the bounds

Sat, 07 Mar 2009 21:36:02 GMT

. i was my ex's first love. would that mean we really don't have a chance to make it work jst bec we are each other's first?

if you were my ex, would you regret having "crossed the bounds" with me,your first ever and serious love?

just a question.

she's adamant about not giving it a try again, but im really worried about letting her go..

. . .

Fri, 27 Feb 2009 20:52:17 GMT

dry....

.......

...................

>.<

here we go again

Mon, 22 Dec 2008 14:37:41 GMT

hay..life's lessons really take quite some time to be learned/mastered.
one example:

you were damped.
she moves on..

suddenly,,,
she misses you.
asks you to call her
you yield.
bec you miss her too.

then...
what now?

when she makes the initiative,you easily yield to her needs.
but when it's about your turn,well you'll probably wait for nothing.

is this the kind of attention i want?
i must admit, i like it when i win the wooing game.
but when i don't, it's so damn heavy in the inside.

...

Fri, 19 Dec 2008 18:41:49 GMT

it's 3 am and i chose not to sleep 'coz there's still this residual effect on me.
thank you for missing me.thank you for giving me another chance to talk to you.

thank you for the good fight.we talked about setting up a date.it started as a behavioral science assignment of mine.even if we both know it's a lie,we still agreed that i will observe you "privately", naked and all.

it was a good fight because we ended up with no set place nor time.
we've won against this dirty sin of fornication-a fight we've fallen against a lot of times before.
it left me now this kind of inexplicable feeling-a special kind of romance way much deeper and beyond the four corners of our torrid beds.

thank you for fighting with me.I've long wanted to prove you how much you worth to me,
but this pleasurable yet deceitful expression always ruin things unknowingly.
and now, we both know how much we devote this with each other-to no one else but you and me.
all we need is to wait.

i want you to know that i have all the will and power to fight any battle,knowing you are behind me.

good night my dear..

down under

Tue, 09 Dec 2008 14:47:07 GMT

i wish i could hibernate this christmas until spring,that way, people won't see me on my most devastated state and get influenced by my aura..

damn..

can we now talk?

Tue, 09 Dec 2008 14:42:47 GMT

i don't know if you can read this..

please give me a sign that we could already talk.

im still an open ear..and that's the least thing that could feed my longingness for you.

always take care of yourself tricia.

-love,
red w

struggling..

Mon, 08 Dec 2008 13:10:49 GMT

i don't want to live a life like this anymore.

"parang hindi ko na kaya."
part of me is so damn tired dreaming and hoping you'd come back, that one day you'll finally give up in this game..that you'd tell me you need me.that even if i'm always broke, even if i'm not your ideal atenista guy who's so confident, who can always pay the bills when we go out..and that you like me for everything i am..the same way i've always liked and loved you eversince i got to know the real you.

another part is telling me to move on..to let you learn the lessons the natural way, and just hope along the way, you encounter less dangerous, and more vivid road to take.

patricia..
i still care for you..
and i hate the feeling and the fact that i'm slowly getting there..

i don't want to move on tricia.
i decide and choose not to move on.

i want you

i still want you..

please..tama na ang larong ito.
i give up.
i've learned my lesson..
i know di ko na maibabalik ang mga pangyayari..

but i really do regret everything i've said and done.
i regret showing you that kind of me that night.

i know things wouldn't be as sweeter as before if ever bec we won't work in the same group anymore.
less seeing each other,less fights..

please tricia...

i surrender.

come away with me again..

a good poem repost dug from a friend's acct..

Wed, 03 Dec 2008 14:10:33 GMT

…bordering inappropriate…

i was blessed with a very sweet and lovely sun,
but instead of thanking her for the day that was,
and continued to look forward
and grow..

i chose to tell tales of if’s and but’s,
that angered and offended her
ever pure and chaste heart.

and my once
immaculate intentions
are now tinged and
cloaked with guilt and shame.

Was it me to be blamed for?

was it my innocent, mute
mind? (that now
shouts for pardoning)

my lips,
(that failed to express
the introvert feelings
of its Lord heart?)

my bold tongue,
(in which gasping for the sincere utterance,
carelessly hurled
words of thorns

that cut thru the delicate

strings of her true
but intricate feelings?)

my thirsty animal being?
my cold corpse,
(which longs for life,
for the heat of her warm love..)

my sinful limbs
(which tried not to
defile her sacred earthness,

but to warm her
from the solitude chill;

and to protect
and keep her in my wings.)

would you not offer me
your arms anymore?
if I ask you to fly with
me during the night?

are you now deaf to
your seraph’s call ?

do you not love
your man anymore?

-sleepless anonymous

(this is one of the good old memories of how i won her back during one of our major cool-offs, by writing this poem.and i pretty much doubt if it would be effective this time..though hope is still there..maybe i'd try reliving the extrovertness-in-pen of myself so i'd feel a lil bit of fulfillment in this tiny blogs)

coincidence?

Tue, 02 Dec 2008 12:17:12 GMT

Thank God for creating coincidence, defined as meeting by chance (?), even if we didn't really talk at all, nor look at each other's eyes the way we used to.

Brushing along each other is enough, for I want to give you the space you asked for.

Seeing you again face to face, just few feet away made my day. And meeting/seeing you in this way would sustain me everyday.

Your sunkissed-tan face tells me your even more beautiful despite the conflicts, stresses, and frustrations that go along your way.

Stupid me, I still hope for romantic moments with you..I know I'll soon get over you. I'm sorry if you have to change your numero de portable and maybe your e-mail address just to evade my messages and pleas.

I promise you, I'll eventually get over you, and give you total freedom.

wake me up when December ends 2

Mon, 17 Nov 2008 16:44:53 GMT

I look forward to this month. I know you'd become busy with work engagements, and you have been so stressed all the while.

And good thing shebangs has her own life, cries for her own needs and wants. And she longs for me..she longs for my kisses.

When that month comes, she would submit for my hunger. I'll caress her. I'll kiss her like I did never before. I'll serve her till she burst out of joy..

Hay...I miss you so much baby..